Hypothesis: “I’m more spiritually evolved if I am the Twin Flame chaser” true or not?

I teach Twin Flames at theXblog.org

There is a persistent, self-congratulating belief among the Twin Flames, that because you are the chaser, that makes you the enlightened one who hasn’t got commitment issues. That, obviously, is a dangerous generalization to make, anyone should see that without problems.

While this is true in some cases, it is not true across the board, of course. For one thing, you may have been mistaken about the whole Twin Flame thing, and you’re chasing a nothing but a huge crush down the aisle. A Twin Flame is certainly not synonymous with “a valentine” or “a crush” although both expressions have been used of a Twin Flame before.

The runner may run because he or she, usually a he,┬árecognizes that although there is chemistry, she is not yet ready for a mature relationship, and he cannot explain that to her because she’s not enlightened enough to receive this information yet, and instead of accepting this as the truth, she insists on a relationship, pouts, and throws a small tantrum to convince him that he’s the one with issues. Clearly, not. A grown up understands that they can’t always get everything they want, even when the rejection comes from an actual Twin Flame.

She may also be too immature to go into an equal partnership with him, expects him to take care of her like she was his child, financially or otherwise, insists he keeps fit and stops seeing his friends, while she should have all the freedom in the world and he should stay at home minding the babies in the name of equality and modern feminism. A mature, self-respecting, and spiritually enlightened man will run at the sight of such a woman.

What Twin Flames call “running” is often also a form of respect. He understands he doesn’t want her the way she is, but he also will not disrespect her persona by attempting to alter it to his liking, so he will remove himself from the equation and “run”, as in, end the relationship with her in a mature way. One reason for running is that he doesn’t want to tell her to lose weight because that is not for him to say let alone make demands on, but he feels that to him, in a sexual relationship, that is important and a deal breaker if she doesn’t feel the importance of physical health and fitness the same way he does.

Too often women who have simply wound themselves dumped by someone who genuinely doesn’t want them, hide behind the Twin Flame theory to explain to themselves why someone would ever say “no” to them. This stops the necessity of accepting his point of view and his decision to be a valid one, and gives her all the excuses in the world to keep hanging onto someone who she cannot accept genuinely dumped her – again, doesn’t make her the enlightened one, but the self-deluding one.

There are more reasons to running than I could ever poke a stick at, some of them are a result of the runner being a more advanced individual, some are the result of the runner being less ready for a relationship, and scared of the intensity of his feelings – yet… It’s a massive compliment to give to oneself that “oh he’s just afraid of how much he loves me…” And yet, something along those lines is what happens between actual Twin Flames; it is not about “enlightenment” but most often nothing more exotic than one’s own insecurities and fear of rejection, but even more commonly; the maturity in the face of a perceived rejection: “I don’t think she is very interested in me, therefore, I’ll just accept my fate and move on.” Nothing is more common in the actual Twin Flame scenarios than two chasers who both think the other one runs.


Currently, I teach Twin Flames on the basis of an advanced soulmate theory the Personality Mirror Soulmate Typology at theXblog.org.